I was so so busy this morning and a colleague of mine asking me to go to the receiption counter as someone looking for me. I saw a BIG bouquet of flowers- red roses.

I know its from him... With a message "please forgive me"

When I walked in to the off, all colleague looking at me asking me all sorts of questions

What special occassion ???
What specialday??
Anniversary??

So so many more... I just shake my head and said no special occassion...

Too many ppl at different time and event asking me

At last I can't take it and said " not for any happy thing"

Then they asked " so its an appology flowers- so r u happy now and forgive him?

I just shake my head with a smile to hide my sadness...

I didn't look at the flowers when it arrives. Later on the day before I left the office, I had a closer look at the roses... I don't like roses but these roses are really nice and quality roses- stands out strong and firm - dark marroon red..

It is really a beautiful bouquet.. It's 24 stalks...

This is my 4th time receiving flower/s from him

First was on my first birthday celebration - it was 3 stalks of roses

Second was my last day in Unilever

Third was an appology flowers

Fourth is the same appology flowers

Flowers should be given on special occasions and happy reasons but not in my case for the last two times..

I dun receive flowers on my birthday..not even a celebration or a cake

I dun receive flowers on valentine

I dun receive flowers on anniversary

I dun hv a flower when he propose... And I still can't forget the hesitated and embarrassed look at the restaurant in Athens when he proposed.

If this flowers arrive at the early stage of our arguments , I think I may still think about it..

Not at the last stage when I requested for him to move out...only he started to do something which is flowers..become meaningless to me... Both of my legs are on another side of the road and it is too small an effort from him to ask me to return. The damage that he has done to my heart is not something that can be heal with roses. And let the damages to turn worse by not doing anything for the past 2.5 months.


He dropped me a sms before he left to Taiwan for holiday again ..


"I am boarding now.....really hope I can be with you forever. As long as you can forgive me. I will whole heartedly do what ever you want. Love you June, always do."

I do not need him to do whatever I want..
I just need him to use his heart in this relationship and keep every single words he said.

When I newly know him, I was very impress that he remembere every single thing I said.

But now, not only he can't remember mine but he don't even remembered what he has promised

Really I dun see his heart for this relationship...

I really can't...